Someone hiding facts, looking for others emotional reactions, using them towards their advantage were the characteristics of a typical manipulator.They appear as if your best well-wishers, can be sugary sweet speakers but, in reality they are your emotional drainers, space crampers. Sounding blunt, but there are these relations worth keeping safe emotional distance.
They are experts in taking you for free guilt trips.The more emotional you are, the more easy to induce guilt. These so called manipulators are easy to identify with little careful observation. Almost always they blame the situation or others for their suffering, paint picture of being a victim, most important to notice they do it with deliberate intention, Your guilt is their feed to blame you.
But why do they do it? Some people when they go through extremely damaging hurt / stress in their life, over a period they learn this faulty coping mechanism as a way of protecting themselves. Other possibilities could be active modelling of a close family member in their growing up period (childhood) where they found it rewarding or relieving from stress. Over period they grow upto be habitual manipulators. If you think they are outsiders, mistaken, they are your own emotionally related family members. No escape, learn to survive😟